The latest...

I've been putting this off for so long...and I'm not really sure why. =/

Hmm...where to start...

Well, probably the biggest news as of right now is this:
I am moving back to Oregon after year team. For those of you who are saying, "yeah, duh. What was the other option?" Feel free to skip down a few paragraphs...
But for those of you who understand the hugemassiveness (Yes, I made up this word) of this statement, read on. =)

(I'll try to keep this short...) So, right before Mobilise, I was really struggling with this decision. I had quite a few concerns about moving back home and I've absolutely fallen in love with this city and the people here. Our training week here in St. Louis was the Mon-Fri before Mobilise, and I just KNEW that God was going to make the decision clear to me. I responded to an altar call, and in that moment, I heard God speak to me more clearly than I ever have.

In short, He reminded me of what I was, what I am now, and gave me a glimpse of what I will be. Reminding me of how far I've come, of the gifts he's placed in me, and stirring a new desire in me to go shake things up back home. I felt a peace like never before (regarding this decision) and I knew that God had his hand in me going back to Oregon.

I AM excited to go home. But, I've got to be honest, every day I pray that God gives me the strength to get through these last few days here with joy. Because, although there is no better place on earth than living in God's will, I DO know that I'm going to miss everyone here terribly and I MIGHT have a tendency to spend these last 2 months being sad that I'm leaving....which would just be lame. =)

So...that's exciting news for some...not so exciting for others. Truth is, I hear almost daily that I should "just stay here" and I truly truly would love to. But, I know that God has such great things in store for me, and the River Center, and all of Oregon. Heck, He's got great plans for the Northwest. =)

In other news:
These past few weeks have been so great. My love for these boys (Jo & Dill) grows every day...it's retarded! At the beginning of the year, I wanted to punch them both almost daily! =) We really have grown SO much as a team, it's amazing. It's been great to have 2 guys in my life that I know I'm safe around. Like 2 big brothers I always wanted. (Except that they're both younger than me....I forget that sometimes though)

Josiah has grown so much in his ability to lead worship! It has seriously been a dramatic change. He went from this half-way decent guitar player who sang random songs all the time, to a man who is truly after God's heart, worshiping more than anyone I know, becoming more and more skilled in his guitar playing, and learning to truly LEAD people into worship! It's been so amazing to see God really work on his heart, teaching him how to put his wisdom and knowledge into words that are helpful to other people, and it's ALSO been amazing to see his love for Dillon grow. (this one was sometimes a challenge, let me tell ya!) Ha! So proud of him!

Dillon has seriously transformed/morphed/changed/shifted (whichever of these words is more dramatic) into a leader in the last few months. He's always had such a huge heart for lost people (Evangelism is CLEARLY one of his gifts!) and it's been intense to see him learn to balance his heart for other people with the practical day to day life. He's gone from participating in a prayer meeting, to initiating nights of prayer, and directing things. His passion is so intense that it's really really difficult not to be affected by it. Lol. He's probably one of the best question-askers ever. He can strike up a conversation with anyone and immediately get their attention. He always has these somewhat odd, but thought provoking questions. He hears from God. And it changes his life daily. What a concept...

Here's a great example: Right now, Dillon is sitting across the room from me and he said,

"Have you ever thought what it would be like if the whole world fell down in the Spirit all at once? And Then they all get up and shout 'YEAH JESUS!' all at the same time?"

"Umm, no, Dillon. Can't say that I have." =P

It does make me a little sad knowing that we only have 2 months left together. And I really do hope that we keep in touch. (at least a little bit!) But, I know God has such amazing things planned for these guys! We joke about the three of us meeting up again some day to plant a crazy awesome church. =)

So, about ME. God has really been teaching me about being confident in my gifts. (I think this is a lesson I've been learning slowly but surely all year long...) But, I tend to get quiet or not speak out when I'm around people that are intimidating to me. (Usually people that are older than me) and God has really been challenging that. Testing me obedience....*gulp* It's been an amazing and scary process. But obeying God is such a freeing thing! (Try to make THAT make sense in your mind!)

A few days ago I was really thinking about some of the things I want to get involved in when I get back to the River Center and even getting a little frustrated because I don't know how I can transfer over the things I'm doing here, and be effective in the same way back home. And one of the ladies in the church was talking to me about the importance of realizing that the specific things that I do at Jubilee aren't necessarily things that God will have me do in the River Center. The main thing is that God has taught me about my leadership skills, what my strengths and weaknesses are, and it's yet to be determined how those things will play out once I get back home. But just seeing that I AM capable of so much more than I knew, is such a huge thing to learn.

So, the conclusion is this: I'm excited to move home, not excited to leave here. This will always be my second home. It just kinda sucks that is has to be SO far away. =) Thank God for planes...

Well...we have some things to get done this morning before we head off to Wentzville for the weekend.

Love and miss you all. =)
Brit